Keeping up with Jake in March

An actor goes to see a cardiologist.

Actor: “How long have I got, Doc?”

Doctor: “Ten”

Actor: “Ten? Ten what? Ten months, weeks, days?”

Doctor: “Nine, eight…”

 

So, last week I packed some genetic red flags and clothes into an overnight bag and flew down to Christchurch to see a cardiologist to find out the state of my heart. Patches were shaved on my chest, electrodes stuck on and I was gently slid into the centre of a doughnut shaped machine.

I briefly thought, pending the results, this may be the closest to a doughnut I ever get again.

A pre-recorded voice guided my breathing, the machine hummed and whirred. 10 minutes later I slid out again.

That afternoon, lovely cardiologist, Dr Clive Lowe, (I find it reassuring that “live” is part of his name) interpreted the C.T. scan. Calcified plaque in the arteries is an indicator of coronary artery disease so the amount of calcium detected in the scan is a great predictive tool.

A Calcium Score of 0 means no evidence of heart disease, 100-400 shows moderate evidence, over 400 and you need to seriously question your relationship to doughnuts.

My Calcium Score was 50 – my risk of a heart attack is minimal to mild (my favourite kind of risk!)

The next time I’m in Christchurch will be in September with Paradise or the Impermanence of Ice Cream. The play is loads of fun but physically demanding.

Nice to know I’ll be performing with all my heart.

 

Life’s full of plot twists – don’t miss ours! Join our mailing list and you’ll get sneak peeks at new shows, ticket deals, and stories that might just change the way you see the world. Click here to sign up!